“Whenever you stand praying, forgive, if you have anything against anyone; so that your Father also who is in heaven may forgive you your transgressions.” Mark 11:25 NASB

We were blessed to stay with our grandparents (who lived beside us) while our parents worked. When we arrived in the morning, our grandmother would be making breakfast. There would be homemade biscuits, fresh eggs, bacon or sausage, and coffee. How I loved the smell of her breakfast.

On the back porch, there was a wooden bucket with a dipper. There was no running water in the house. That would come in just a few years. I loved that bucket. She kept water in it for us to drink. The dipper was everyone’s “glass”. I know what you’re thinking, “Not good hygiene”. But, back then that’s how most folks did it. Turns out that bucket provided a visual for forgiveness in my life.

I don’t usually wrestle with forgiveness. Most offenses are dealt with. Forgiven. I picture putting forgiven offenses in a box. Setting the box on the side of a dirt road, I then walk away leaving the box containing unforgiveness behind.

This visual works for me. I just don’t carry the unforgiveness box with me. It’s too heavy to carry.

Then I had a time when the box wouldn’t remain closed. Unforgiveness crept out of that box and kept running me down on my life’s road.

I had experienced an event that threatened to destroy my family. Try as I might, I could not get my feelings to come into line with my will. I forgave. In my will I determined that I had forgiven…I spoke forgiveness, realizing my feelings should catch up with my will. Over and over I spoke forgiveness and my heart would not cooperate. I asked Father God to speak to me. I needed a visual.

On the way home from the river one day, the Lord answered my prayer. In my heart, I heard these words, “Receive the love, grace, and forgiveness that God has living within you. Draw out a deposit of that love, grace, and forgiveness and pour it out over the offender.” 

At that moment, I realized I did not have it within me to forgive, but Jesus living in me did. Apart from Him, I was powerless. But with Him, drawing on His love and forgiveness, all I needed was the willingness to dip a “dipper” into that internal bucket of Him and pour it over their heads.  As I did that in my mind, I immediately was released from unforgiveness. As the water of His forgiveness washed over their heads and down to their feet, a huge weight lifted as my feelings came into line with my will.  I  realized all I needed to do was draw on Him. He would accomplish all things. I wept. 

I asked Abba God to make this issue “dead “ to me. That when it came up in my mind or I heard their names, there would be NOTHING in me. No pain, sorrow, anger, unforgiveness…and He did it. 

Someone came to me and mentioned them…that they knew me…and wonder of wonders! I didn’t even recognize their name! It was amazing…unbelievable. Our God is mighty. And He does hear and answer prayer. 

Our Father has forgiven me, forgiven all of us, for so many wrongs. We must do all in our power to get to Jesus. Then allow Him to lead the way to forgiveness and forgiving.

I’m grateful for an old wooden bucket and a beat-up metal dipper. They helped me visualize forgiveness in a new way